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Starting my estate
Author: Galactus
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(Added on Mar 21, 2010)
(This month 90326 readers) (Total 100938 readers) |
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In a future where slaves are toys to the rich, a young man inherits his parents' fortune, and begins buying slaves. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 6 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (8/10) |
| Average
Rating: (8/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (9/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (7/10) |
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| Reviewer:
saxman66
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 29, 2011 |
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Damn! Thought I had reviewed this. Have a problem where I seem to lose the log-in and have to do it again so possibly that happened.
Anyway, very interesting story and mix of characters. Fascinating that having lusted for Ivy so long Ryan finally gives her up without seriously fucking her. Possibly a sign of maturity that he can discard his earlier desires, although given her experience and knowledge both of managing his estate and of slave trading it could be a case of dropping the pilot.
I normally find modern/near future systems where slavery has become widely established without drastic events highly unlikely but you seem to have developed a reasonable scenario. Furthermore, despite having wide powers he is recognising that his slaves are still people and that he will get the best out of them by treating them decently. [With the exception of Cynthia, who is a special case of course]. Also some development of the character of the girls rather than just 1-D submissives.
Looking forward to seeing more of this story. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
Dryhill
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 20, 2011 |
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This story is well thought out and has good characterization. Unfortunately there are a few spelling errors in the first few chapters, but at least i could only find one in the latest two chapters.
The advantage of using a New World Oder is that one can conjure up some wicked situations and scenes that could not work if set in our real world. Having said that too often an author has a good idea but fails to really deliver, but that is not the case in this story.
Having had a few interesting emails from the author i can only say i really am looking forward to his future additions to this delightful story. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
doctorgoff
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 27, 2010 |
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This is a world that I can believe in and I hope to hear more of it.I love the complexity of your Ivy character and could easily come to hate the smug self-satisfied rich idle bastard who is your protagonist - that`s a complement to your characterisation skills rather than hate as in don`t like what you wrote. More please don`t stop yet. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
Illuminatus
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 13, 2010 |
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Quite fun! Looking forward to more. There were a few jarring changes of perspective (from the main character being I to being He and back again, in the space of a few sentences). Also description seemed a little scant in places, especially of people and their appearance / actions / emotions. (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
Nemz
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 7, 2010 |
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I have to agree with mechgogo, you've done well establishing the story and settings. The characters actually have a personality and aren't two dimensional. There was a few grammar mistakes within the story, but they were easy to overlook. Asking someone to edit the story before publishing might be a good idea, just to help lesson the mistakes.
Also, although I realize the sex scene in the second chapter was meant to be a quickie, it would be nice to read some detailed or at least longer scenes in the future. =P (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
mechgogo
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 22, 2010 |
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This is a good start. Nice foundation piece that promises more intriguing action to follow. Looks like the author did some good world building before getting into the story, figuring out what the rules of this society were and what was likely to drive the various people in it. Thats always a plus for me in erotica. I especially like the fact that Ivy actually has some spine to her and isn't a passive little meat-doll. I'll definitely be keeping an eye out for future installments.
(8/10)
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